Where Has Gizmo Gone

August 05, 2019
It's been awhile since I've been able to write. Writing this is putting severe pressure on my chest at the moment. It's something that should be said but doesn't have to fully explained.

Our 6 year old Mini Rex, Gizmo passed away on June 24th around 3 pm. He was euthanized after finding kidney stones in both kidneys. He was in so much pain and from the time I went to bed to the time he passed, it wasn't Gizzy anymore. It was a Gizmo I did not recognize. He couldn't walk. He couldn't sit in a comfortable position. It was terrible and tore my heart into the tiniest pieces.

Gizmo actually laid his head on my lap. Looking up at me with huge black eyes, I had a feeling he wasn't going to come home with us alive.

I remember the vet coming in and trying to explain to us that one of his kidneys is twice the size and surgery could be a possibility if the other kidney wasn't infected. His lower heart rate put him at an even higher risk.

To keep this short, Gizzy couldn't be saved and there was absolutely nothing the vet could do. She said bladder stones are more common than kidney stones and this case was only her second one ever. None of us know how he got kidney stones. The vet said it was just his kidneys slowing down and he was probably born with a weaker set. Both Gizzy and his brother passed in less than a year and a half from each other, I knew Gizmo never got over Samson being gone.

Complete exhaustion couldn't explain how we felt. I had never cried so hard in my entire life and gave myself a massive head ache. It still feels like a daze and I can't remember everything. My mind is trying to protect myself from being hurt again.

Gizmo was buried with his brother and when I walked away from their graves, I told them I will see them again but I have to go forward with my life. Bunnies don't live forever even though I wish they would.

As time passes, it gets easier. Bunso has a new brother named Mushi. Bunso also snuggles with us and sleeps in the bedroom. Bunso demands pets from Mushi just like he did with Gizmo. Mushi has taught me how to love again and letting me be able to give all the love I had for Gizzy and Sammy to other buns.

Having Gizmo has brought me so many things. I got to have a semi successful Instagram because of him and his cuteness. I started working with the local rabbit shelter to give back to foster buns. I have educated myself on rabbit care like I should have when I was 12 and now I get to tell other people all about rabbits and how they should be treated. Gizmo and Samsons passing won't be forgotten as a piece of me went with them when they left. I promise to Gizmo, Samson, Bunso and Mushi that I will try to give back as much as I can because they all gave me so much.

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